Crime Mapping Lets You Find Out What Area Not To Move To
Think you’re safe from raiders, pillagers, and others in your cozy little suburb once the sh*t hits the fan? Think again. The Crime Mapping website offers city dwellers an outlet for their paranoia: detailed descriptions of the crimes that are being committed in their area, as well as icons for the class of crime. Think of it as a slower police scanner you can view online for free. Way more crime happens in nicer areas than you might think too. And a few weird ones. Pick random areas all around the US and you’ll be surprised what crazy ass people are up to.
Welp, looks like Oakland is SOL. Just make sure to check in every once in a while, and if you see a bunch of red fists with the details saying “Assault – Trying To Eat Victim,” Shut and lock the doors. Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, hide yo husband, cuz they eating everybody!!! You can receive crime alerts as well which is pretty nifty. Especially if you’re a pizza delivery guy. Better brush up on that Tae Bo if you’re a pizza delivery guy in Oakland. How else are you going to scale walls to escape from drug addicts and transient hookers?
